TGIF | Quit Your Resolutions & Do This Instead
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Dear Community,
I know I’m not alone in feeling like Christmas was a million years ago and that this week has been wild. Monday hit hard with brain fog and a shock to the system. I know many of you are battling sickness and we’re all wrapping our hearts around the California wildfires.
And yet, here we are, another new year. I’m not going to spend this first newsletter of 2025 advising on the "new year, new you" jargon. I’ve found, time and again, that it’s never about becoming a new you—it’s about returning to yourself.
So this year, today, I offer an intention that is expansive, soft, and hopeful: spaciousness.
Holding Space
There is something sacred about holding space. My dearest friends know me well enough to understand that quality time—someone carving out an hour for me—is my love language. It’s how I give and receive love. In our fast-paced lives, slowing down to be available for someone is a gift for all involved.
Doing this without expectations or the need for reciprocity allows tenderness to unfold. Think about how it feels when you can let your guard down, just be with someone, without needing to perform, please, or caretake. They hold you in their space, allowing you to relax, feel cared for, seen, and heard. You can offer this to someone else too.
Holding space has become a meme thanks to the stars of Wicked, but the term has been used in therapy for decades. Therapists are trained to be non-judgmental, curious, present, and attuned, understanding the power of holding space.
Try it, even if it’s just while listening to Defying Gravity. ;)
Creating Space
Spaciousness can also be found in our daily routines. Years ago, I implemented a “White Space” day in my schedule—Tuesdays were cleared for contemplation and creation. While it has now morphed into just an afternoon, the practice of creating space has shifted into my other days.
I have a “no rushing” policy. I abhor being late or hurried. Over the years, I’ve built more buffers into my schedule, reduced commitments, and said “no” more often.
The stress of back-to-back meetings and rushing isn’t the energy I want. I prepare in the evening—lunches, snacks, workout clothes, and schedules—so I can have a spacious morning routine. A 6 AM workout and meditation allow me to spend quality, unrushed time with my family in the afternoons.
Perhaps this is the year you take things off your schedule to create space.
Embodied Space
How many of you struggle with capacity for anything more? I felt that way when faced with registering for summer camp and planning my entire summer by January 8th. Yet, somehow, we find a way.
Resilience is about stretching our capacity, overcoming limits, and persisting. While it can feel like hustle and struggle, embodying spaciousness means adapting to challenges with softness. It can mean pausing or taking more time. I love answering questions or talking with my eyes closed—a therapist hack that helps slow down and be intentional.
When we slow down and breathe deeply, our nervous system relaxes, releasing pressure and allowing us to settle.
I love the image of a snow globe—when the snowflakes settle, there is plenty of space within.
New Year, Expanded You
This new year, consider spaciousness—holding, creating, and embodying space. See how it feels in your body. I hope it brings a sense of softness, nurturing, lightness, and ease.
And it can start with just one deep breath.
Hugs to you. You’re never alone, so please don’t hesitate to reach out. We’re all in this together.
This week’s Tools, Gratitude, Innovation, Feels
Tools
I recently quit my gym (sounds like the opposite of New Year's intentions, huh?) to return to my at-home workouts. The reason? I missed my time in my Sauna Space. These precious 20 minutes are something I look forward to every day. Heat, sweat, quiet. It also works wonders for seasonal blues.
Gratitude
Anyone else overindulge over the holidays? I had a rough re-entry last weekend as my body came down from sugar, alcohol, and lack of sleep. However, I felt so grateful that my body knew what to do (headaches, night sweats…) as it cleansed the system. It cleaned my space, my vessel, and the body is a miraculous thing.
Innovation
Perhaps another way to bring spaciousness into your new year is to limit wasted time. For most, time spent online, scrolling, makes up much of that. My favorite way to restrict unintentional time sucks is the app Opal. It helps me make the most of my moments, stay focused, and yes, create more space in my day for what really matters.
Feels
At Reset, our word for the year is intentional. When we talked about what that means for us, many of the answers had to do with purposeful action, alignment, and authenticity. Intentionality is so much about pausing and slowing down enough to check in with yourself and your long-term desires. Intentionality is often about thinking past “go” and tapping into how something will feel days, weeks, or months from now. Remember that as you move through this next year—how do you want to feel next year at this time? What actions support that?