3 Ways to Lessen the Holiday Stress
As we near the holidays and some of us are experiencing more stress from the expectations than the joys of the season, I wanted to point out a few more resources that might help you through this time.
First, here are 3 ways to lessen the stress during the holidays
Put connecting with others at the top of the list.
For families that have strong traditions like making cookies together, or singing at the piano, or playing games together during the holiday, this piece of advice may come more naturally. For those of us who don’t have that, we can feel even more unconnected than usual as we are witnessing and feeling the pressure of what we “don’t have.”
The good news, we too can curate connection in our lives during the holiday. It may not look the same as other families but we can prioritize and have the benefits of connection.
Some things I’m doing over the holidays to curate connection:
Writing a thank you note to my high school career counselor. Yes, it’s been over a decade but I want her to know how much her support has meant to me all these years.
Volunteering at the humane society. With people traveling, extra volunteers are often needed. And connecting with animals is a very good connection for me.
Watching an old tv series with my brother and dad.
Renting a board game and playing it with my brother.
Schedule downtime for yourself. And don’t skip it.
On the flip side of that, you may schedule yourself to volunteer at a bunch of places and be so burnt out by the end of it all that the connecting piece won’t matter that much anymore. The holidays are a great time to slow down. So schedule a time where you will just be at home, without any big plans, maybe just a cup of hot chocolate, a book, or some music, and give yourself this much needed break.
Refocus on gratitude.
When you feel expectations crushing you (especially ones that make you think about all the things that you don’t have), refocus your attention on things you are grateful for. Every time I feel a sinking feeling about the holidays, I immediate ask myself - what am I grateful for right now - and answer the question. It can be as simple as “I have this little plant and it’s so cute and I’m so grateful that I get to keep it in my home.”
And now, here are some resources that might help you get through tough moments:
Experiencing a lot of pain?
This 7 minute guided meditation helps you redirect your attention to neutral things and therefore cut the intensity of the pain.
Feeling like you are about to boil over with anger?
Remove yourself from the situation if you can.
Take a sharpie and post-it notes or any paper you have around. Color the entire page with the sharpie, put your anger into it.
Have a pool noodle around or a pillow? Twist the object as hard as you can, putting all of your anger into it.
Write down all the ways you are angry and the noises you feel like making when you are angry.
Go for a brisk walk or run outside to expel your anger from your body.
After doing exercises like this to the point when you feel that energy leaving your body, take three deep breaths. And with a clear mind, you can now decide how to move forward.
Feeling anxious and fearful?
The Clear Fear app is free and helps you with dealing with your emotions, managing your worries, reacting to your worries and managing physical responses to anxiety.
Need help preventing self-harm?
Sometimes the holidays really push us, even to behaviors like self-harm. In case of emergency, call 911 and request a CIT (Crisis Intervention Trained) Officer.
You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).
There is also a free app called Calm Harm with activities that help you comfort, distract and express yourself, as well as other exercises like breathing and releasing pressure.
Remember, there is no “right” way to spend the holidays. If the focus is on connection, compassion, awe, and gratefulness, then you can’t go wrong. It doesn’t have to look like the perfect holiday scenes you are seeing on Instagram or Facebook for you to get the benefits of the season.
Click here to learn more about therapy for stress.
